"When are you going to stop wishing for a better past?"
This is the question that stopped me in my tracks at a meditation retreat years ago and made me question my life. I realized I had let my regrets and past struggles define me and I was holding on so tightly to that story. I was denying myself happiness. I understood that other people deserved grace for their past mistakes; we all did our best with what we had at the time, right? Why couldn't I apply this acceptance toward myself?
"On paper", my life looked great: Despite being a single mother with 2 small children, I was able to start a wedding photography business and still stay home with them. Over the course of 17 years, I had photographed nearly 600 weddings while simultaneously designing a line of couture wedding gowns that have been carried all over the globe, featured in magazines and on the TV show "Say Yes to the Dress NY". BUT, all I saw were my mistakes and how I could have done better.
Once I started to see how crazy that was, and as my children approached adulthood, I decided to figure out what I truly wanted my life to be about. I discovered mindfulness and got my eating back on track. I decided to wipe the slate clean. I closed both businesses, moved, started working at a Functional/Integrative Medicine practice, and went back to school. I wanted to start anew, accepting my past failures, but only putting my energy into today; what could I do each day, each minute to be aligned with what I valued? What did I even value, for that matter?
Through yoga, healthy eating, mindfulness, and meaningful connections, slowly but surely a new me began to emerge and happiness was flowing into my life. It was amazing to me how much of an impact these lifestyle changes made on my entire outlook on life.
Sure, I knew my body would get healthier, but my mind too? Of course, I still make mistakes, but I know I am doing the best with what I have at this moment and I accept myself.
What brings me joy today, besides my wonderful children (Can I still call them children even though they're adults?), is learning anything new, creating (anything), and showing my clients how small changes in their thinking, eating, moving, connecting, and accepting can create big impacts in their lives.
What's important to me
My wonderful kids. Watching these two grow into the strong and talented adults that they are has made me a better human.
- CYT (Certified Yoga Teacher) - Yogaworks
- Certified Health Coach - Functional Medicine Coaching Academy
- FLT (First Line Therapy) Certified - Metagenics Lifestyle Medicine Program